I'm often conscious of eliminating certain words in my life because I know they are just not useful and never create a positive result.  Using this word in particular keeps me in a spinning cycle of negative self-talk and then I freeze or distract myself.  

So what word is it?


I should eat better.

She/he should call me back.

They should stop telling me what to do.

The word, should is deceiving because it sounds like it would be useful.  We think that perhaps it might motivate us or someone else to take action, but guess what?  It doesn't.  

Take a moment. 

Try it on and let me know how it feels.  

Do you feel it?  Does it feel good?

To me it feels like guilt.

When I say it about someone else, I feel like I’m judging or shaming them.

Do you see how it’s not useful?!


I invite you to choose to use the word COULD instead.

I could…

She/he could…

They could…


When I use could instead, it feels much more empowering.  

I could eat better, but I guess right now I’m choosing not to.



I challenge you for the week to be conscious of when you use it.

Notice when you talk to someone else using the word should.  

Catch it, then release it.





Let go of what’s not useful +

Focus on what IS useful.  

This is how you can stop wasting time and energy.


Want to learn more?

Eliminate this word + watch your life shift.

Want to feel better? Eliminate this word in your life. #abundancemindset #selfrespect #healthyrelationships #confidencecoach #success✨Sign up for the next Ask a Life Coach session https://www.8020livingco.com/ask-a-life-coach/

Posted by Vanessa Leung, Success and Wellness Coach on Sunday, August 18, 2019


Vanessa Leung is a Success Coach, Speaker, Blogger and the founder of 80/20 Living & Co.

Vanessa teaches a simple and practical method to help ambitious leaders and coaches to stop negative patterns and get sh*t done with ease.  Her unique set of tools and techniques help her clients move beyond their fears and elevate their energy and confidence. That way, they can succeed in their business while living their best life.

Are you ready to live in abundance?

Scroll to top